my final plea

The impact statement I presented to the judge (July 2008) during the trial for Protective Order Violations. He plead guilty and received nine months probation.

During our marriage, I endured emotional and physical abuse that required medical attention several times. My injuries ranged from bruises to broken bones. Police officers were frequently called to our home and emergency room visits became routine. My children and I have been through consistent counseling since leaving him three years ago. Initially, my daughter suffered with separation anxiety, nightmares, and hyper-sensitivity. My son struggles with controlling his behavior and is aggressive in his play. Both have come a long way and will continue to improve. I have been through intensive individual counseling and weekly group therapy. I have experienced anxiety, panic attacks, nightmares, insomnia, depression, and flash backs. The lingering effects of the abuse have disrupted current work and personal relationships. I have a difficult time trusting people and dealing with confrontation. These symptoms are a direct result of his daily abuse. After leaving my husband, I was granted a Protective Order; we are here today regarding violations of that Protective Order. In June, I was granted a second Protective Order based on these violations. Throughout all of this, I have lost my job four times due to being harassed, filing police reports, being served subpeonas at the office or taking time off for court hearings. This has caused a loss of income as well as pride. My children and I now live in protected housing provided by the Family Violence Prevention Service center. I live life constantly looking over my shoulder, scanning every room before entering. I avoid certain areas of town, stores, and restaurants. When I find myself in these places, I am taken aback as I recall whichever horrible incident occured there. I have been forced to walk down many city streets trying to get away from him as he repeatedly passed yelling profanities at me. I have hidden under bridges and ran to strangers' houses for safety. I have been hit, kicked, stomped on, spit on, bitten, pushed, pulled, choked, and had things thrown at me. My scared children watched as all this happened. It was when i felt his abuse was being directed at my children that I left. He pulled my daughter by the seat of her pants and threw her into the back seat of the car. he also threw a ketchup bottle at my son's head because he would not stop crying to be held. This is a man with a history of violence. At eighteen he was convicted of a felony offense involving unlawful handguns. During our relationship, March of 2004. he was convicted of family violence. He has been court-ordered to take anger management three times and has not begun. his visitation rights have been suspended until he completes the twenty week course. He has not seen our son in over two years. He is over $8,000 behind in child support. he is not a concerned parent by any definition. He has always considered himself above the law, smarter than those in control. He walks the fine line in every situation. I ask that when deciding on this case that you keep in mind what I have been through as a result of his actions; and tht you know that the continued safety of my children and myself is partly in your hands.